This October is a very emotional roller coaster for my family. We have a real reason to call this month "Respect Life Month." My oldest sister was expected to give birth to a baby girl, Abigail Therese, at the beginning of this October. However, Baby Abby had different plans, and a greater purpose than we can make sense of. She was called home to Heaven and was delivered on June 23. The funeral, the pictures, the release of the expectations we had for this little girl seemed to fly by like in a foggy haze. It was surreal. While I cannot even imagine what it is like as her mommy or daddy, I know it hurts so badly as an auntie to have to say goodbye before even getting to say hello.. The morning of Abigail's projected due date, I sat up and my first thought was "wow! I don't have anything to do today!" Then, instantly, adding insult to injury, I felt like this should have been the day I was driving home. I could have been staying with my nieces and nephew and bringing them to meet their new sister! There was no more denying it. Baby Abby is supposed to be here, and she isn't. I sat and cried, and spent the morning talking to my sister through text messages. It feels so stupid and crazy and fake. We have little pictures of her tiny, perfect little hands and feet and face. She was so pretty. Only 25 weeks in utero, and already she had the roundest, chubbiest cheeks--just like her two sisters and brother!. Every part of her was perfectly human, and yet Heavenly angelic. Why can't we hold her? Why can't she be here with us? Our minds know she is well and grown and singing with angels, but our hearts are selfish and long for her little baby snuggles.
It is times like these when we realize the importance of life. No matter if she was not born yet, she was an alive little person. I remember feeling her little kicks and seeing her wiggling on the sonogrmam screen when they told us it was a girl. Even if an older person is not able to take care of themselves any longer, they are still a living person. My sister admitted that even if she had known how her pregnancy would end, she would still choose to carry Abby again. We can learn much from people in their most vulnerable states.
There are no words to heal what has happened, but the acknowledgement that Abby was a baby that my sister lost means everything in the world. Just because we didn't know her for long didn't mean there were no hopes and dreams for everything she would do in life.
If you know anyone who has lost a life, no matter how young or old, acknowledge it. Treat life with respect.; from womb to tomb. Being able to see Baby Abby was like having a little peek into God's workshop. Every life truly is a miracle, and perhaps it took a tiny angel to prove it.
Happy October, and many blessings to anyone who has lost a life of any kind.
It is times like these when we realize the importance of life. No matter if she was not born yet, she was an alive little person. I remember feeling her little kicks and seeing her wiggling on the sonogrmam screen when they told us it was a girl. Even if an older person is not able to take care of themselves any longer, they are still a living person. My sister admitted that even if she had known how her pregnancy would end, she would still choose to carry Abby again. We can learn much from people in their most vulnerable states.
There are no words to heal what has happened, but the acknowledgement that Abby was a baby that my sister lost means everything in the world. Just because we didn't know her for long didn't mean there were no hopes and dreams for everything she would do in life.
If you know anyone who has lost a life, no matter how young or old, acknowledge it. Treat life with respect.; from womb to tomb. Being able to see Baby Abby was like having a little peek into God's workshop. Every life truly is a miracle, and perhaps it took a tiny angel to prove it.
Happy October, and many blessings to anyone who has lost a life of any kind.